Chapter 4: ## Chapter 4: The Name My Mother Feared
: The Name My Mother Feared
My father read my mother's warningMy father read my mother's warning three times before he finally sat down.
Linda didn't three times before he finally sat down.
Linda didn't move.
She stood against the hallway wall, her fingers pressed against her mouth, staring at the letter as move.
She stood against the hallway wall, her fingers pressed against her mouth, staring at the letter as if the ink itself had become dangerous if the ink itself had become dangerous.
Mia looked from her mother to my father.
“What does that mean?”” she demanded.
Mia looked from her mother to my father.
“What does that mean?”” she demanded.
“Why would Aunt—why would Evelyn's mother write something about Daniel.
“Why would Aunt—why would Evelyn's mother write something about Daniel?””
“He isn't your uncle,” I said automatically.
Mia shot me an?””
“He isn't your uncle,” I said automatically.
Mia shot me an irritated look.
“That isn't the point.””
For once, she was right.
The point was that my irritated look.
“That isn't the point.””
For once, she was right.
The point was that my mother had written Daniel's name months before she died, and she had apparently been worried enough to leave instructions about mother had written Daniel's name months before she died, and she had apparently been worried enough to leave instructions about him.
My father lowered the letter.
“Linda, how did you get these documents?””
“I told him.
My father lowered the letter.
“Linda, how did you get these documents?””
“I told you. I don't know what you're talking about.””
He held up the envelope.
“You were standing you. I don't know what you're talking about.””
He held up the envelope.
“You were standing beside Mia when I found it. You went pale when I read beside Mia when I found it. You went pale when I read the note. And now you're telling me you know nothing about it?””
“I didn't say I knew the note. And now you're telling me you know nothing about it?””
“I didn't say I knew nothing. I said I didn't understand what it meant.””
“Then explain why these nothing. I said I didn't understand what it meant.””
“Then explain why these papers were hidden in your daughter's bedroom.””
Linda's gaze flicked toward Mia.
M papers were hidden in your daughter's bedroom.””
Linda's gaze flicked toward Mia.
Mia immediately shook her head.
“Don't look at me. I didn't put them there.””
My father turned to her.
“Did you knowia immediately shook her head.
“Don't look at me. I didn't put them there.””
My father turned to her.
“Did you know these documents existed?””
“No.””
“Did your mother give them to you?””
“No!””
“ these documents existed?””
“No.””
“Did your mother give them to you?””
“No!””
“Then why were you holding them?””
Mia's mouth opened, but no answer came.
IThen why were you holding them?””
Mia's mouth opened, but no answer came.
I watched her fingers twist around the hem of her expensive blouse. watched her fingers twist around the hem of her expensive blouse. For years, I had seen that gesture whenever she was about to lie.
For years, I had seen that gesture whenever she was about to lie.
Linda noticed it, too.
“Mia, go to your room.””
“No. I'm tired of everyone talking around meLinda noticed it, too.
“Mia, go to your room.””
“No. I'm tired of everyone talking around me.””
“Go upstairs.””
“Why? What are you hiding?””
Linda stepped toward her daughter and lowered her.””
“Go upstairs.””
“Why? What are you hiding?””
Linda stepped toward her daughter and lowered her voice.
“Do not make this worse.””
Mia recoiled.
“You said Dad would never look voice.
“Do not make this worse.””
Mia recoiled.
“You said Dad would never look into the accounts.””
The hallway went silent.
Linda's face changed.
My father slowly into the accounts.””
The hallway went silent.
Linda's face changed.
My father slowly lifted his head.
“What did you just say?””
Mia looked as though someone had pulled the floor from beneath lifted his head.
“What did you just say?””
Mia looked as though someone had pulled the floor from beneath her.
“Nothing.””
“I heard you.””
“I didn't mean—”
“You said your mother told you I would her.
“Nothing.””
“I heard you.””
“I didn't mean—”
“You said your mother told you I would never look into the accounts. Which accounts, Mia?””
She looked at Linda.
Linda grabbed her wrist.
“Stop talking never look into the accounts. Which accounts, Mia?””
She looked at Linda.
Linda grabbed her wrist.
“Stop talking.””
“Let go of me!””
Mia pulled free so violently that Linda stumbled against the.””
“Let go of me!””
Mia pulled free so violently that Linda stumbled against the wall.
For a moment, the two of them stared at each other.
Then Mia started crying.
“I didn't wall.
For a moment, the two of them stared at each other.
Then Mia started crying.
“I didn't know it was Evelyn's money!”” she blurted out.
“Mom said it was hers. know it was Evelyn's money!”” she blurted out.
“Mom said it was hers. She said Dad had given her money to manage, and she said everything we spent was allowed.””
She said Dad had given her money to manage, and she said everything we spent was allowed.””
My father went very still.
“How much did you know?””
“Nothing! I swear!””
My father went very still.
“How much did you know?””
“Nothing! I swear!””
“Did you know about the trust?””
Mia shook her head.
“Did you know about your mother's letter?””
“Did you know about the trust?””
Mia shook her head.
“Did you know about your mother's letter?””
“No!””
“Then explain why you said I would never look into the accounts.””
Mia wiped“No!””
“Then explain why you said I would never look into the accounts.””
Mia wiped her cheeks with the back of her hand.
“Because Mom told me you never checked the her cheeks with the back of her hand.
“Because Mom told me you never checked the statements. She said you trusted her with everything.””
Linda's voice cracked statements. She said you trusted her with everything.””
Linda's voice cracked like a whip.
“Mia!””
But the damage was done.
My father looked at his wife with an expression I had never like a whip.
“Mia!””
But the damage was done.
My father looked at his wife with an expression I had never seen before.
“You told your daughter I would never check my own accounts seen before.
“You told your daughter I would never check my own accounts?””
Linda lifted her chin.
“You?””
Linda lifted her chin.
“You were busy running your company. I handled the household finances were busy running your company. I handled the household finances. That's what spouses do.””
“Not by hiding records.””
“I wasn't hiding anything!””
My father held up the envelope.
“Then why were these hidden?””
Linda stared at the papers.
For a few seconds, I thought she might finally tell the truth.
Instead, she turned toward me.
“This is your fault.””
I blink. That's what spouses do.””
“Not by hiding records.””
“I wasn't hiding anything!””
My father held up the envelope.
“Then why were these hidden?””
Linda stared at the papers.
For a few seconds, I thought she might finally tell the truth.
Instead, she turned toward me.
“This is your fault.””
I blinked.
“What?””
“You always had to be the center of attention. First your scholarshiped.
“What?””
“You always had to be the center of attention. First your scholarship, then your graduation, and now this ridiculous dress. You couldn't simply accept that your sister made, then your graduation, and now this ridiculous dress. You couldn't simply accept that your sister made a mistake.””
I looked at her in disbelief.
“My mother wrote a warning about Daniel before a mistake.””
I looked at her in disbelief.
“My mother wrote a warning about Daniel before she died. How is that my fault?””
“Because you keep digging!””
“I didn't even she died. How is that my fault?””
“Because you keep digging!””
“I didn't even know these documents existed until five minutes ago.””
“You always have know these documents existed until five minutes ago.””
“You always have an excuse.””
My father stepped between us.
“Linda, if you blame an excuse.””
My father stepped between us.
“Linda, if you blame Evelyn one more time for something she didn't do, I will ask you to leave this house today.””
Linda stared at Evelyn one more time for something she didn't do, I will ask you to leave this house today.””
Linda stared at him.
“You wouldn't dare.””
“I think you've mistaken my patience for permission.””
He turned toward me him.
“You wouldn't dare.””
“I think you've mistaken my patience for permission.””
He turned toward me.
“Evelyn, I need you to stay here with Mia while I make a few calls. Don't touch.
“Evelyn, I need you to stay here with Mia while I make a few calls. Don't touch anything in that envelope.””
“Where are you going?””
“To my office anything in that envelope.””
“Where are you going?””
“To my office.””
He held up the letter.
“If your mother left this warning, I want to know why.””
.””
He held up the letter.
“If your mother left this warning, I want to know why.””
He walked downstairs, carrying the documents with him.
Linda remained frozen untilHe walked downstairs, carrying the documents with him.
Linda remained frozen until the sound of the front door closing reached us.
Then she rounded on the sound of the front door closing reached us.
Then she rounded on Mia.
“What were you thinking?””
Mia stared at her mother through tears.
“You told me everything was Mia.
“What were you thinking?””
Mia stared at her mother through tears.
“You told me everything was fine!””
“Lower your voice.””
“You said Dad would never find out!””
“I said he trusted me fine!””
“Lower your voice.””
“You said Dad would never find out!””
“I said he trusted me.””
“You said the money was yours!””
.””
“You said the money was yours!””
Linda grabbed Mia's shoulders.
“And it was supposed to be!””
Mia went quiet.
SoLinda grabbed Mia's shoulders.
“And it was supposed to be!””
Mia went quiet.
So did I.
Linda seemed to realize what she had said. Her hands dropped.
I did I.
Linda seemed to realize what she had said. Her hands dropped.
I took a step forward.
“What does that mean?””
“Nothing.””
“You just took a step forward.
“What does that mean?””
“Nothing.””
“You just said the money was supposed to be yours.””
Linda's expression hardened.
“You heard incorrectly.””
“No said the money was supposed to be yours.””
Linda's expression hardened.
“You heard incorrectly.””
“No, I didn't.””
She moved toward me, lowering her voice.
“You have no idea what happened before, I didn't.””
She moved toward me, lowering her voice.
“You have no idea what happened before you were old enough to understand. Your father doesn't tell you everything.””
you were old enough to understand. Your father doesn't tell you everything.””
“Then tell me.””
“Ask him.””
“I am“Then tell me.””
“Ask him.””
“I am asking you.””
Linda looked toward the staircase, then back at me.
For the asking you.””
Linda looked toward the staircase, then back at me.
For the first time since she entered our family, she seemed less interested in making me feel first time since she entered our family, she seemed less interested in making me feel small than in making sure I stopped asking questions.
“Your mother wasn't the small than in making sure I stopped asking questions.
“Your mother wasn't the saint you imagine,” she whispered.
My stomach tightened.
“Don't talk about saint you imagine,” she whispered.
My stomach tightened.
“Don't talk about her.””
“She made promises to your father. Promises her.””
“She made promises to your father. Promises she never intended to keep.””
“Stop.””
“She left him with a dying business, a sick she never intended to keep.””
“Stop.””
“She left him with a dying business, a sick child, and a mountain of debt. I was the one who helped him rebuild his life child, and a mountain of debt. I was the one who helped him rebuild his life.””
“That isn't true.””
“You were eleven. What would you know?””
I stepped.””
“That isn't true.””
“You were eleven. What would you know?””
I stepped closer.
“I know she loved me.””
Linda closer.
“I know she loved me.””
Linda laughed bitterly.
“Love doesn't pay bills.””
“No,” I said.
“But apparently laughed bitterly.
“Love doesn't pay bills.””
“No,” I said.
“But apparently, stealing does.””
Her hand rose.
For one terrifying second, I thought she was going to, stealing does.””
Her hand rose.
For one terrifying second, I thought she was going to slap me.
Then Mia caught her wrist.
“Mom, don't.””
Linda stared at her daughter.
Mia's eyes were wide.
“You can't slap me.
Then Mia caught her wrist.
“Mom, don't.””
Linda stared at her daughter.
Mia's eyes were wide.
“You can't hit her. Dad will never forgive you.””
Linda slowly lowered her arm.
hit her. Dad will never forgive you.””
Linda slowly lowered her arm.
I backed away, my heart hammering.
She straightened her robe and smoothed her hair asI backed away, my heart hammering.
She straightened her robe and smoothed her hair as if nothing had happened.
“I'm going downstairs,” she announced.
“ if nothing had happened.
“I'm going downstairs,” she announced.
“When your father returns, I expect both of you to remember that this is stillWhen your father returns, I expect both of you to remember that this is still a family matter.””
She walked away.
Mia remained beside the overturned laundry a family matter.””
She walked away.
Mia remained beside the overturned laundry basket.
I looked at her.
“Why did you do it?””
She wiped her nose.
“Do what?””
“Destroy my dress.””
She basket.
I looked at her.
“Why did you do it?””
She wiped her nose.
“Do what?””
“Destroy my dress.””
She gave a disbelieving laugh.
“Are you seriously asking me that now?””
“Yes.””
She stared gave a disbelieving laugh.
“Are you seriously asking me that now?””
“Yes.””
She stared at me for a long moment.
Then she looked away.
“Because Dad was going to take you to graduation.””
at me for a long moment.
Then she looked away.
“Because Dad was going to take you to graduation.””
I frowned.
“What?””
“He told Mom last night that he had cleared hisI frowned.
“What?””
“He told Mom last night that he had cleared his schedule. He said he wanted to be there when you received your diploma.””
I remembered the message schedule. He said he wanted to be there when you received your diploma.””
I remembered the message my father had sent me the previous evening.
*Tomorrow is your my father had sent me the previous evening.
Tomorrow is your day, sweetheart. I'm proud of you.
I'd read it so many times that I had memorized every word day, sweetheart. I'm proud of you.*
I'd read it so many times that I had memorized every word.
Mia's voice grew sharper.
“He never clears his schedule for me. When.
Mia's voice grew sharper.
“He never clears his schedule for me. When I had my driving test, he sent a driver. When I graduated from high school, he I had my driving test, he sent a driver. When I graduated from high school, he left before the ceremony ended because he had a meeting.””
“You told him you didn't left before the ceremony ended because he had a meeting.””
“You told him you didn't mind.””
“Because Mom said I shouldn't make him feel guilty!””
mind.””
“Because Mom said I shouldn't make him feel guilty!””
She laughed, but tears spilled down her face.
“And then he told herShe laughed, but tears spilled down her face.
“And then he told her he wanted to take pictures with you. Just you and him. He even said he wanted to he wanted to take pictures with you.
Just you and him. He even said he wanted to stand beside your mother's photograph before you left.””
I couldn't speak.
Mia stand beside your mother's photograph before you left.””
I couldn't speak.
Mia pressed her palms against her eyes.
“I thought if your pressed her palms against her eyes.
“I thought if your dress was ruined, you wouldn't go. I thought Dad would stay home to deal with everything, dress was ruined, you wouldn't go. I thought Dad would stay home to deal with everything, and then he wouldn't have to choose you over me.””
I stared at her.
“You destroyed my dream because you were afraid and then he wouldn't have to choose you over me.””
I stared at her.
“You destroyed my dream because you were afraid he would be proud of me?””
She dropped her hands.
“He's always proud of you he would be proud of me?””
She dropped her hands.
“He's always proud of you!””
“No. He has been proud of both of us at different times. You just couldn't!””
“No. He has been proud of both of us at different times. You just couldn't stand that I might have one day that belonged to me.””
Mia's face crumpled.
For the first time, I saw something stand that I might have one day that belonged to me.””
Mia's face crumpled.
For the first time, I saw something beyond jealousy in her expression.
I saw a girl who had spent years competing for affection beyond jealousy in her expression.
I saw a girl who had spent years competing for affection without ever believing she had enough.
It didn't excuse what she had done.
It didn't repair my dress without ever believing she had enough.
It didn't excuse what she had done.
It didn't repair my dress.
But it explained why she had reached for the scissors.
“You could have talked.
But it explained why she had reached for the scissors.
“You could have talked to me,” I whispered.
She shook her head.
“You would have won.””
“There was to me,” I whispered.
She shook her head.
“You would have won.””
“There was nothing to win.””
“You don't understand.””
“Then explain it to me.””
She looked toward the staircase.
“Mom said nothing to win.””
“You don't understand.””
“Then explain it to me.””
She looked toward the staircase.
“Mom said if you ever found out about the trust, everything would fall apart.””
My blood turned cold.
“What trust?””
Mia's eyes widened.
She had if you ever found out about the trust, everything would fall apart.””
My blood turned cold.
“What trust?””
Mia's eyes widened.
She had said too much again.
I grabbed the edge of the banister.
“Mia, what did your mother tell you?””
Before she said too much again.
I grabbed the edge of the banister.
“Mia, what did your mother tell you?””
Before she could answer, a phone began ringing downstairs.
Linda answered.
I couldn't hear the person on could answer, a phone began ringing downstairs.
Linda answered.
I couldn't hear the person on the other end, but I heard her say, “No. Not now.””
A pause.
Then, more urgently, “You said those papers were gone.””
M the other end, but I heard her say, “No. Not now.””
A pause.
Then, more urgently, “You said those papers were gone.””
Mia looked at me.
All the color drained from her face.
Linda's voice dropped to a whisper.
“Yes,ia looked at me.
All the color drained from her face.
Linda's voice dropped to a whisper.
“Yes, I know about the letter. But Richard has it now.””
Another pause.
Then she said something I know about the letter. But Richard has it now.””
Another pause.
Then she said something that made my knees feel weak.
“Daniel, you promised me Evelyn that made my knees feel weak.
“Daniel, you promised me Evelyn would never see those documents.””
I turned toward Mia.
She was staring at me, her mouth trembling.
The attorney hadn't would never see those documents.””
I turned toward Mia.
She was staring at me, her mouth trembling.
The attorney hadn't merely failed to protect our family.
He had apparently been part of the secret.
And downstairs, Linda was still talking.
“Listen merely failed to protect our family.
He had apparently been part of the secret.
And downstairs, Linda was still talking.
“Listen to me,” she whispered into the phone.
“If Richard finds the original agreement, we're finished.””
A door to me,” she whispered into the phone.
“If Richard finds the original agreement, we're finished.””
A door slammed.
My father had returned.
Linda stopped speaking.
Then my father's voice rose slammed.
My father had returned.
Linda stopped speaking.
Then my father's voice rose from the living room.
“Who were you talking to, Linda?””
Neither of us moved from the living room.
“Who were you talking to, Linda?””
Neither of us moved.
A second later, he appeared at the foot of the stairs, holding his phone.
His eyes.
A second later, he appeared at the foot of the stairs, holding his phone.
His eyes settled on his wife.
“Because Daniel just called me.””
He looked at the envelope in his hand settled on his wife.
“Because Daniel just called me.””
He looked at the envelope in his hand.
“And he claims he has no idea why your name is on my late wife's warning letter.””
May you like
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“And he claims he has no idea why your name is on my late wife's warning letter.””
